Coronavirus Diaries: Day 3

Polly is supposed to be on a virtual book club. Apparently hasn’t read the book. So Griffin is following her around the kitchen reciting the spark notes. Somehow this doesn’t strike me as quite the literary magic that was intended – especially since Griffin keeps inserting his own commentary. Like “I don’t understand why she…

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Coronavirus Diaries: Day 2

So after the nipple dinner conversation we decided that some structure might be nice. Everyone needed to show up to the dinner table with some interesting topic that they learned about during the day. Polly started with the history of the Vikings pointing out that Scandanavia didn’t include Finland but did include Denmark. That was…

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Coronavirus Diaries: Day 1

“What’s the tip of your nipple called?” Dinner.  First day schools have been cancelled.  Of apparently many more days to come. “Why on earth is is that what’s on your mind?” Isn’t there a lawyer rule that you’re not supposed to ask a question you don’t really want to know the answer to? “Well, I…

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Christmas 2019

The Meyers.  2019. Why can’t you use your shower?” “I need the space.  I worry that I might miss things.” “Miss things?” “Like with shower gel.  I may need more coats.” I look at Griffin.  Who talks like this? “Hello parental unit.” I guess his brother. “The mother unit is unable to come to the…

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Christmas 2018

The Meyers.  2018. “Did he pass out?” We are standing in a circle looking down at Cooper.  Who is spread eagled on the ground.  Eyes closed. “I don’t think so.  He’s moving.  <pause>  Is he moving?” “Cooper, are you ok?” “Mmmmm.  <silence>  Nt…ut…iss… mas.. ter.” “What did he say?” “Cooper, what?” “Mmmm.”  Groan.  “Don’t… put……

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Holidays 2017. Er, a little late.

The Meyers. 5:10am Riley wriggles under the bed.  With his butt sticking out.  Every morning.  At 5:10. It’s cute were it not for the fact that it sounds like he is falling off the side of a building and only holding on by his fingernails scrabbling for purchase like some dog James Bond movie.  It…

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Mother’s Day

I didn’t display a ton of foresight when I took a Tylenol PM on Mother’s Day Eve.     <pause>.     I didn’t display any foresight when I took a Tylenol PM on Mother’s Day Eve.   “Dad.”   Fog   “Dad.”   Light grey.   “Dad.”   “Mmmm.”   “Mom just went to…

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Christmas 2015

2015.  (Ben-16; Cooper-14; Griffin-11; Christian-7) “Which way do I turn?” “Go to the high school.” “Yeah, but which way?” We are in the driveway. “What do you mean which way?  Ben, you have been going back and forth from school twice a day for two years.  Are you serious?” “Well.  When you put it that…

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