Mother’s Day

I didn’t display a ton of foresight when I took a Tylenol PM on Mother’s Day Eve.     <pause>.     I didn’t display any foresight when I took a Tylenol PM on Mother’s Day Eve.   “Dad.”   Fog   “Dad.”   Light grey.   “Dad.”   “Mmmm.”   “Mom just went to…

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Boys Weekend – Part 1

Polly went to her college reunion leaving me with instructions on building a nuclear power plant and/or still having 4 living children at the end of the weekend.  By 7am I was late.  By 8 I had forgotten to feed the dog, forgotten which field we were supposed to be on, and forgotten to clothe…

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Boys Weekend – Part 3

We are back at the house.  We have been to two soccer games, a baseball game and a Bar Mitzvah.  It is 2:30.  I have gotten it into my head that I am going to paint and stain the deck.  So by my calculations, if I multiply by 6, subtract 2 and assume 20%, I…

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The 6 Million Dollar Dog

“Daisy blew out her knee.” None of those words are registering. “What do you mean?” “She tore her ACL.” Silence. I look over at Herschel Walker who starts to wag her tail.  Thump. Thump. Thump. Now some people say that you can tell if you are in shape or not by looking at your dog….

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Umm, that’s not going to work.

One of the Littles is all excited to use his first Amazon gift card to buy a Pokemon box.  But with tax, it comes out to $10.78.  He is creative.

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Vader and the Animal Hospital

While Darth Vader is not always an expected visitor at the Animal Hospital,  he has typically been welcomed.  Unfortunately, in an attempt to get the breathing just right for his four-legged audience, Vader ended up hyper-ventilating and sitting down on somebody’s cat.  The vet has politely asked that Mr. Vader refrain from such energetic performances…

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It was this big…

Griffin was less excited to find out that he swims in the same water as the fish.

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Spring Break – Dallas Airport

I had a moment.  Christian just swiped his backpack across the table taking two glasses of water with it.  I was standing 20 feet away, coming back from the bathroom.  It would have been so easy to pretend not to recognize them. I went up to Polly and said “excuse me m’am, can I help…

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Spring Break – Orange County Airport

Am back in the airport.  The boys are arguing whether a quesadilla is a dessert or a meal.  Christian is emphatic it is, in fact, dessert.  Cooper says no cheese for dessert.  Ben is pointing out that people do eat cheese for dessert.  Griffin thinks that’s dumb.  Christian is now yelling that it is a…

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Spring Break – SeaWorld

Off to SeaWorld.  Christian just announced that he dropped his car in the toilet and that it was especially hard to get out because there was a poop in the way.   The car has gone quiet.

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Spring Break – Mastercard

1 lovey (bear) nestled right up against the urinal 1 confiscated jack knife 1 son who looks like his sweatshirt is birthing his head 1 son who has now asked 4 times when we will be there (we have yet to get on the plane) Same son who is now lying on the floor becoming…

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Summer 2011 – Trip to WI

Day 1 About 75 minutes into the trip it does flit across my mind that I could still drive to the Hartford airport.  The same thought emerges with a little more pressure as we come close to the Albany airport. “Daddy, I went POOP!!” Christian is triumphantly pointing a brown finger at me. The fact that…

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Summer 2011 – Trip to WI

House looks like Hiroshima.  Chances of us leaving at 8am – zero. Christian is singing shake your booty – not sure where he caught that – and Cooper is egging him on.  I think I have a hint. Ben is watching the drier waiting for some socks.  Griffin is MIA.

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